But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
come pick your gf up from my house. she's sitting in the fridge and hissing at the cat to let her eat the potatoes. btw i dont have a cat
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
Randomize
