I just puked in an auto zone parking lot. I'm never eating peanut butter and red wine for dinner again.
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
My mom is wine drunk and on painkillers. As invigorating as that conversation was, it was also a dark glimpse into my future
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
Who knew sons of strippers would be really feminist boyfriends?
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
Randomize