you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
i'm so high that for the last 10 minutes i pretened my sock was a mouse, and played with it like it was legit.
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
For future reference. Do not congratulate the bar tender at oscars she is not pregnant she has just gotten fat u will get a shot thrown in your face
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
my new years resolution to eat more toast and mastrubate more often is going well so far.
You kept flirting with some guy while I was throwing up on the sidewalk, and I screamed YOU DON'T LIKE MEN
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
You chased a rabbit then knocked on a police car and asked the cop "if he saw where that little bastard went."
Randomize