I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
The creepiest man is serenading me at the bar right now. I had about a quarter of a drink left and the bartender just walked over and filled it with vodka and walked away laughing.
Like wrapping my dick in silk, wrapping that in velvet, and putting it in a cloud. A warm, tight, wet cloud.
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
She got up, grabbed me a box of gushers told me to start eating, and immediately gave me the best head I've ever gotten.
Randomize
