you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
You kept telling me how warm your bag of vomit was and asked me if i wanted to feel.
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
I just found a To Do list on the table, written by me last night, that just says "1. Go downstairs. 2. Get Pickles. 3. Laptop"
I think it's safe to assume that dad heard you lose your lesbian virginity last night
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
My vagina is very pro this idea
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
I’ve jerked off three times and taken five shits already today. Being hung over in your 40’s is a fucking roller coaster.
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