i wonder why nobody wants to date me...im doing a crossword at work and asked out loud: whats a 4 letter word for 'a reason to get married?'
i was like PREG?
dude, i woke up naked in her front yard...apparently i tried to leave in the middle of the night, forgot my clothes and decided,"oh heres a nice patch of grass to sleep on" I think god is up there laughing at me.
remember when you found twisted pleasure condoms in my parents bathroom? theyre gone.
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
I woke up with a piece of pizza duct taped too my hand and a paragraph written on my chest. Good night is say
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
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