Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
Exact words that were just spoken as she was on her 6th, yes 6th piece of bread: "I'm only eating the soft and chewy inside of the bread-I am taking the crust home to feed my turtles"
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
LIKE ALL I WANT TO CURE MY HANGOVER IS PORKROLL AND LIKE 85% OF THIS COUNTRY DOESN'T KNOW WHAT IT IS
Let me get this straight. You stopped mid foreplay to shave your legs?
Um yeah. I wasn't about to shave them if nothing was happening. And I have HBO. It's not like he's the victim here.
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
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