Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
Giving me the bigger bowl of ramen isn't considered "romantic"
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
tonight were gonna drink champagne and watch girls put themselves in awkward position
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
I just matched with a taco on tinder. Dreams come true.
Randomize
