I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
I showed him my bush... on skype.
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
The toilet started ringing, I think I just found your phone.
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
Took me 12 hours to be sober again. Shitshow mission accomplished
Also, I found out tonight a major plus for being female is you can accidentally call the hot bartender sweet tits and she won't get mad.
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
I'm shopping for Mother's Day cards while waiting for my herpes medication. What is life.
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
Randomize
