Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
as if moving home wasnt embarassing enough, mom picked up my laundry while i was gone. guess who needs to find a new hiding spot for his cum towel..this guy.
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
It's not weird mascara. I just have puke crusted on my eyelashes.
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
I'm not drunk enough to eat silly string
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
I've literally NEVER been on a date or gotten through one episode of netflix without having sex like I JUST WANT TO WATCH TRUE DETECTIVE
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
Let’s be real here. NOTHING says Real Adulting like rolling a J on your line of credit paperwork.
Randomize
