Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
I got kicked out of a mexican restaurant last night for being too drunk. This is getting dangerously close to rock bottom
If there's so much of a hint of a whisper from somebody I didn't tell personally, I will cut off your balls with a chainsaw, cauterize the wound with a flaming rusty spoon, feed your balls to your dog, and feed them to you when he shits them out, capiche?
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
Good news, finally found someone who remembers Saturday night. Bad news, everyone in the bar saw your penis
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
Almost gave myself a concussion stealing a stuffed unicorn hanging on a street sign but hey I got home safe
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