Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(202): View more from Washington, DC

yo i have your phone

(202): View more from Washington, DC

... oh so you probably won't get this message

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(206): View more from Washington

Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.

(425): View more from Washington

i'm in love

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(917): View more from New York City

M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.

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(630): View more from Illinois

whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.

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(256): View more from Alabama

Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.

(662): View more from Mississippi

Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?

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(316): View more from Kansas

There are 144 bottles of wine in my mother's pantry. She just shrugged her shoulders and said it was for the wine pong tournament on Christmas Day.

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(228): View more from Mississippi

I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?

(601): View more from Mississippi

probably "functioning vagina, must touch"

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(775): View more from Nevada

He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.

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(405): View more from Oklahoma

Just showered and cleaned every bit of sex off of me cuz i have a feelin my stepmom has jesus powers and would be able to smell it on me

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