we're blogging at a bar
Let's just have a brief moment of silence for my dignity before we start tonight
Alcohol only hurts me because he loves me.
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
I just realized I have yet to puke in your new apartment. Clearly we're doing something wrong. On my way over with Cuervo as I type.
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
Just pee around me
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
Official reason: I couldn't get time off. The real reason: last Xmas nearly ended in alcohol poisoning to prevent me from screaming like a velociraptor
My car insurance payment showed up today, so no inflatable hot tub for now. Sorry to disappoint.
I drunkenly said, "That's my future father-in-law!" And everyone made an uncomfortable / disgusted face... including the aforementioined future father-in-law. Maybe I should start dating other people.
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