dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
I fell asleep at the bar. And the bouncer threw a snowball at my face.
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
Are you sighing at your phone and judging me right now?
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
Went to the doctor's today. The lady took one look at my throat and said "oh god"
Too much penis in there.
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
In retrospect, vomiting out of a moving vehicle on the third date should have been a deal breaker
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
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