i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
I wish they had a "No Yankees" filter on status updates.
she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
some people spend their whole lives trying to find their soulmate. who knew mine was hiding in utah successfully balancing a pageant career and a coke habit.
This is why Helen Keller didn't drink
I need Jameson.
Yea? How do you think I feel? Your job during the delivery is to keep that flask ready. The moment our kid pops out, I'm taking a shot.
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
Randomize
