# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
We folded our dollar bills into airplanes. This really makes the strippers work for it. Like air miles.
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
OMG stoned with flashing lights behind me, I was freaking out until I realized I wasn't driving my couch
Statistics show that guys with slightly higher IQ scores and overly-trimmed eyebrows have micro penises. It's science.
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
Apparently I handcuffed myself to the dishwasher...
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
