Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
some girl just asked me how to spell unconscious. I really want to know what she was texting.
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
Tinkerbell just flew up to me and tickled my balls. What the fuck did we smoke?
Someone took a picture of their balls on my phone last night. BEAUTIFUL PACKAGE. I will find this man.
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
Randomize
