i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
When we were fucking, you could hear the beer sloshing around in my stomach
im getting a BJ in a closet
and a penguin just handed me a bong
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
She's trying to change her flight... IM BEING COCKBLOCKED BY DELTA CUSTOMER SERVICE
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
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