He asked me to sit on his face, but i didnt, for 2 reasons, one, i had just pooped like 20 mins before sex, and two, this could be my future husband. so i skipped on sitting.
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
I don't have any swimsuits that don't show off the weird handprint bruises on my hips. Do you have a onepiece I can borrow?
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
Now that it's fall I have to prepare for the imminent arrival of ripped up sweatpants shoved into folded over sequined uggs
You texted him 17 times. Asking for him back and sending random pictures of Jimmy Buffett. He didn't answer.
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
Randomize
