Very drunk. laura says hi. i can't find my pants. i think i'm in philly, but it might be jersey somewhere
Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
Scream out, "Tax-Free dick over here" in the bar. Ladies love tax free stuff
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
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