ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
You know its going to be a good homecoming when you beer bong a mimosa at 6am.
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
I'm bakin' bread in my pussy!
What?
I have a yeast infection.
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
I am intoxicated and cannot bring you a burrito. However, if you want to bring ME one...
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
Theres a live mouse in the toilet. Goddamn you this is why I don't party here
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
Someone sitting next to me at this football game is totally eating chicken nuggets out of his pocket and drinking four loko. I wanna be him.
Randomize
