why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
Nothing says "I love you" like a full raw dog.
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
you were carrying around a glass of vodka telling everyone it was Russian water
I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
I’m good. I learned that a guy ate the mushrooms that were growing out of his toilet, so there’s that.
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