Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
Is there any way to un-invite somebody to a wedding? I just checked out the other family, and I can't have a cockblock there.
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
I will pee on everything he values.
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
idk i was trying to watch Fuller House and you got up out of a dead sleep, just in your boxers, said "no more Dave Coulier" and walked out to the living room and unplugged the router
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
Ya know what's the worst? Being drunk and wanting to show someone a picture of your goddaughter but not wanting to open the pictures on your phone because the first one is of someone's dick..
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
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