he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
An eyelash just fell out into my container of rice. Searching for it, i took a single piece of rice out at a time coming to the coclusion that i should not be this high while eating rice.
you left him a drunk voicemail of you singing speechless by lady gaga balling your eyes out
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
I was at the pharmacy picking up my herpes medication and the pharmacist asked if I had any questions about my medicine, looked at the bottle, and laughed. Insult to injury man.
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
I'm currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
just to let you know, that was probably the funniest text i've ever received.
I suppose that kind of helps fill the void where my self respect used to be.
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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