I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
My life would be so much easier if i could just ride around in the cash cab all day
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
Its 6am and I'm sitting on the couch watching Clifford. Crying into my risotto because emily elizabeth helped the girl in the wheelchair get over her stagefright so she can win a trophy. Never drinking alone again.
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
I guess she found the pillow case full of vomit I hid last night: "Oh my God. Oh my God. In my fucking FRIDGE?! Really? Hope your dick falls off there's puke all over my food. Fucking die."
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
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