I want to stick my p in your. b.
Remember that night when i almost got you arrested? Is that funny yet?
Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
I woke up to 30 angry texts and her Chihuahua in my room. Can you drop him off for me?
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
I am a mess. Weirdest thing: I woke up with a hammer under my pillow. No idea why.
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
All I know is I woke up with my apartment door wide open, naked, and I poured an entire bottle of Advil on my bed to sleep in.
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