you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
Well sundance is in town and Im going to use my one and only shot to bang Taylor swift... Does it count as a random if shes famous?
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
woke up holding a soft boiled egg cup and empty bottle of rum. apparently i couldn't find a shot glass
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
Randomize
