Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
I have come to realize that my purpose in life is less musical and more as a filter of alcohol into water.
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
You kept running up to married couples, taking their pictures and begging for them not to get divorced
Pro tip: When you spend the afternoon banging your boss, don’t meet your mother-in-law for dinner if you still smell like cum and watermelon flavored lube
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