She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
how was your day?
fuck the small talk. are you bringing the liquor tonight or am i?
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
So im on with some ukrainian stripper for a vodka tasting tomorrow. If I die tell my family im awesome
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
Drunk me left sober me a shower beer in expectation of Hurricane Harvey. Drunk me is the best.
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
Randomize
