ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
So we hooked up and then instead of texting me, he endorsed me on LinkedIn for Microsoft Word a few days later
WHY DID YOU DRUNK DIAL MY MOM?!
Because mine was sitting on the bar stool next to me...
Randomize
