If my vag had twitter, what do you think it would say?
I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
I'd apply for another job, but "staring out windows crying" is not a hot qualification right now.
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
My moral compass cannot be waived by two measly bloody Mary's
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
I flushed a potato down the toilet so now we have to live in a hotel.
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