I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
I saved $70 from being to drunk to go out last night so I figured I could buy a new watch.
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
Thanks for getting me stoned. My manager started quizzing me about the menu and I struggled until he asked me to describe the tortilla soup. I said "tasty"
I cut myself stripping on your car. Probably a profession I shouldn't pursue
Let's just say that in a last ditch effort to avoid getting arrested I said to the cop "but I'm not even that drunk" and he proceeded to point out (in front of a crowd) that I had "fucking pissed my pants"
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
I'm about to turn myself in when I'm less hungover.
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
Nothing ruins your day more than waking up to you dogs crotch in your face
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