His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
I hope you have a dream of a sloth with my face touching you erotically
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
My goal in life is to ruin sex for someone. To be so mindblowingly unreal that they can never find anyone like me ever again. So far it's going well.
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
I took advantage of the fact that my mentee had to go to the bathroom to throw up in the other stall. I'm going to hell for being hungover at an elementary school.
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
Randomize
