he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
Hey just to warn you theres a really fat guy passed out in front of our front door snoring. Don't touch him, he's in god's hands now.
If by any chance I go to the hospital make sure you stuff a pint in my pockets so I can keep up.
If you are wondering why there is half eaten pizza in your pocket it's because you were passed out with it in your hand in my bathtub. Today's your b-day and thought I'd give you a good idea about what happened last night as a present
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
I'm sitting in Madison square park surrounded by children thanking god I took emergency contraception
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
Randomize
