Is King's over? Or do I still have to say 'On Matt's cock' at the end of every sentence on matt's cock?
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
This has been your unwelcomed wake-up call, brought to you by exes united. Have a good day, to opt out please type "STOP", to continue but act as though they do not exist please enter "DON'T CARE" for random daily wake up texts by exes united please press "PSYCHO!"
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
These are the last few fleeting sober moments of the day for me. If there is anything you need me to do today, please tell me now
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
Randomize
