chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
Girl walking by was talking on the phone about how he needed to write a gratitude list in her letter to god this week. Too stoned
I brought him to this party even though we're not together anymore because we made a bet on who would have sex first, and it is a sausage fest up in here.
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
Diet Starts Tomorrow! Guy from McDonalds asked if I got a new car...
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
Sorry about the Christmas balls dude. At the time I thought they were festive as fk but I see now I've just spent too much time on the internet
Come by so you can take a pregnancy test with me. It's like my monthly ritual!
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