Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
Left my house last night with a girlfriend, $200 in my wallet, and 10 finger nails. Came home with no girlfriend, an empty wallet, and 9 1/2 finger nails.
Yea, I had a bad night too aha
Live it up bro, they're always so surprised to find out you use magnums, being such a tiny man and all. It's a good thing.
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
Rule number 1 of dorm living: do not forget your butt plug in the bathroom.
Randomize
