why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
Im drinkin out of a coconut! I think im gonna dip my balls in it!
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
He fucked me so hard I might have to go to the hospital for internal bleeding
Can I have him when you're done?
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
After the clumsiest day of my life I think it's safe to say my dream of being a ninja is dead. Memorial service with a glass of wine at 8pm
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
You informed me your place was now a nudist colony and unless I was there to drink schnapps with the cat I had to strip.
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
Randomize
