Sex on a kitchen table is not as amazing as they make is seem in the movies.
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
For the record, just because I'm a mess doesn't mean I don't know what I'm talking about when I give you advice. I'm way better at other people's lives.
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
If making out with three guys at once at a Kesha concert while simultaneously smearing glitter all over yourself doesn't convince her you're gay, nothing will
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
I'm eating ice cream out of my purse
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
Randomize
