Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
bailing my boss out of jail is a great way to spend memorial day
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
I'm pretty sure you thought I could absorb alcohol through my dress
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
I'm stuck on the dance floor between two fat people. I don't think they feel my existence. Please help.
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
Dude. Craziest ride ever. I was convinced that the bus was an airplane. There were clouds when I looked out the window. I got really upset every time the bus turned because airplanes shouldn't turn.
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
Randomize
