You can't hide fat with big sunglasses.
He asked me if I "almost moaned"
If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends.
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
i lost my airplane ticket and tried to board with a bar receipt in all the confusion. i have officially lost all brain cells in college.
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
We officially wrote our house rules 1. We do not waste alcohol 2. Pinky promises mean something 3. Don't leave your facebook open, and if you do, don't complain 4. Never refuse cuddle or catch phrase
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
Randomize
