u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
Dude I just witnessed a midget touching himself and singing the chorus to somebodys watching me by michael jackson... it kinda turned me on
I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
You planned my entire going away party sitting in the bath tub cradling a bottle of Cuervo. You promised me fire jugglers. And a pinata.
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
when my phone is in portrait view you can just assume i've been watching porn. that's the only thing i want to see in full view.
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
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