I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
I don't give a shit if she's homeless, if you're gunna live outside el pollo loco and act like a bitch I'm squirting you with my water bottle
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
I’ve got a sex swing and lube, he’s not going anywhere soon
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