if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
I accidentally got a lemon stuck in your bong. I was trying to make it taste good. Sorry
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
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