am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
I definitely hasselhoffed a taco bell burrito on my kitchen floor in front of my dad and little brother.
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
Watching the blind side bc I need a good cry to make sure I'm still human after this weekend's questionable life choices
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
Do not buy a prego test at the Walgreens you frequent. It's awkward. Just trust me.
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
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