Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
i'm the matthew mcconaghey of this party. i'm too old, and too high.
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
YOU WORK IN THE US CAPITOL! YOU CANNOT HAVE SEX IN THE BATHROOM!!
Dude, you are totally ruining intern season for me...
Someone drunkenly cleaned and organized my car last night... Nothing's missing, so that's a plus.
Lost feeling in my face, my shoe and had a nose bleed. That's not wings. Fuck red bull.
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
You are an awesome peach made of glitter.
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
Randomize
