i just shit an entire soup salad and breadsticks from the olive garden... bud light wins again.
handjob tips. give me some.
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
I heard the bride mutter "I should have brought a fucking tranquilizer". I'm not at all surprised that you got banned from the bar afterwards.
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
Randomize
