I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
Renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'
His ankle bracelet only gets in the way when I'm trying to take off his pants.
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
we were running to make last call and you stopped me and said very seriously "if i fall, go on without me. just make sure theres a beer in my hand when you go"
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
Is there a coat check? I stole 10 vases of flowers along with two bottles of champagne and I'm not sure what to do with them.
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
My general physician told me i have the emotional capacity of a 2 year old, While he refilled my xanax prescription. That's service!
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