I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
At the T-Rex bar with my nephew...only in Disney can I have a beer and a soda at the bar with a 4 year old
I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
I fell asleep after the worst sex of my life and now I'm snowed in with him. SEND HELP. CALL FEMA. GET ME OUT OF HERE.
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
Randomize
