im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
Since when is my name a synonym for head?
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
Welcome to texting with Mike. You're now leaving the sober section and headed to our insanely high bad decision making portion of mike. Enjoy the trip.
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
remember when I told you about my grandma asking me about my sex scars? Less comfortable than that
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home
Lost feeling in my face, my shoe and had a nose bleed. That's not wings. Fuck red bull.
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
There is blood all over my sheets and no discernible source.
Randomize
